Last night, I cracked open a copy of my book Fried Chicken & Wine and read one of the stories. It’s the one about the man who gets fired and with the help of a random stranger, restarts his life. It’s called the Mustard Seed and has a line I particularly needed to reread.
“You’re not defined by what happens to you. You’re defined how you react to it.”
My life currently is like many of yours. There are some things that I can’t control. They’re painful and are causing serious frustration and sorrow. Yet I’m not complaining — life isn’t all cute kitties and cotton candy and I know it. But I’m exhausted and grasped for some encouragement.
“You’re not defined by what happens to you. You’re defined how you react to it.”
Everyday you walk past people who have the weight of the world on their shoulders. They’ve lost a loved one. They face an illness. They’ve lost a job. They’ve been a victim of crime. And everyday, those people get out of bed and keep taking a swing at life. They look for the good and cling on to it. Life’s crap tsunami doesn’t faze them. They keep pushing forward.
My oldest sister is one of those people.
I’ve watched her support her husband as he bravely battled ALS. I’ve seen her be strong and continue to live as her world crumbled after his death. She recently had three trees crush her home in the middle of another crisis. I was Facetiming her as she surveyed the damage. She said, “Thankfully the house was strong enough to keep me from getting crushed.” It wasn’t “poor me.” It was “lucky me.” She didn’t whine. She didn’t blame anyone for her bad luck. She pushed through with the other crisis she was in the middle of and didn’t use the trees as an excuse. Her house will be repaired hopefully within a month. Three gables were destroyed. But she’s still here.
My sister hasn’t allow what has happened to her to define her. She is not a victim. She’s a rock star. And my hero.
To find encouragement, I really didn’t have to look far. And I’m very proud to be her little brother.
Today will be a great day. Because I know one simple truth:
“You’re not defined by what happens to you. You’re defined how you react to it.”
Good morning Marshall!!! Thank you so much for encouraging me through this writing. It is neat to see the stuff that your parents poured into you and your sister. Their years of effort are now shining like a Christmas star.
And you have been willing to be vulnerable and share that with us. It bonds me to you like family and I draw strength from you.