Recent Tweets

More regurgitated Tweets from my Twitter account.

1. Congress censures Rep. Charlie Rangel. It also passes laws to throw people in jail for doing the very same thing.
2. Getting a lecture from Congressmen about spending is like getting a lecture about temperance at a bar.
3. Where there is no vision, the people perish. Particularly behind the wheel of a car.
4. “He thinks I want to be petted. I want out to go pee. What we have here is a failure to communicate.” Banjo the dog.
5. Biloxi to drop charges against MDOT director Butch Brown. In related news, Biloxi to get new bridge to Cancun & streets paved with gold.
6. Five hours a sleep is like an hordeurve when you’re craving a buffet.
7. The phrase “Don’t touch my junk” has a whole different meaning on the show #Hoarders.
8. BREAKING NEWS: Former President Clinton accepts job doing #TSA pat-downs at Washington Reagan National Airport.
9. I once read that you are the sum of your five closest friends. If that’s the case, I should be much better than I am.
10. My money concerns are now over. A nice man from Nigeria has offered to wire $1,000,000 into my bank account.