At mile three, I chugged through the woods and made my way out onto the Natchez Trace. A cold wind whipped across the Reservoir, making my bones ache. I paused for a second and lifted my camera. In front of me was a lone oak tree — a tree that I’ve photographed dozens of times over the past few years during my runs. It never looks the same. Today the blue sky made it stand out boldly. Greens, browns and blues mixed easily. I looked closely at the tree. 2016 has been rough on it. Several branches were missing — victims of various storms throughout the months. I had sympathy for the oak. But I also felt strangely inspired by it. Like many of us, it has taken a beating yet is still there.
You’ve probably noticed that 2016 really has been a tough year (unless you live in a cave). And I’m not just talking about the grim reaper’s brutal assault on celebrities. It hasn’t exactly been a bucket of chuckles for many of us either. Lord knows I’ve taken a few kicks in the groin. I watched my Dad take his last breath. I’ve watched loved ones struggle. I ended up in the hospital and then later ended up with brain scan. To wrap up the year, I gave myself a really stupid concussion. It’s enough to make you shake your fist at the sky.
A few years ago, I was in a boating accident. My friend, my son and I were going down the Buffalo River when our boat flipped. I got my leg wrapped in a drag chain and nearly drowned. That evening, as my friend and I were calming our frayed nerves with a good glass of wine, my son came up and said, “It’s OK. I’m still here.”
As 2016 ends, I am thinking of my son’s words. I’m still here.
I’m sitting at my kitchen table, putting together my notes for a class I’ll soon be teaching. I’m reflecting on the year and looking at what went right and what went wrong. Yes, I lost my Dad (which still hurts) but he’s at peace (free of the Alzheimer’s that he feared). My sisters and I now know more about the kind of man he was and how he loved us. Yes, I had a couple of health scares, but I am healthy. Some of the personal challenges have led to some positive changes in my life. My sons are kicking butt in school and in their activities. Amy has had a good year. My book is doing really well. And even though I’ve lost a step physically, I’m still out there running. I’m positioned better starting 2017 than I was at the beginning of 2016. I also have this insight:
Life is a series of problems. It’s up to us to solve those problems and grow from the experience. Like my Dad once told me, we have to make our story about how we got back up — not how we fell down.
I looked at the oak tree once last time. Strong roots, a strong core and limbs that reach for the sky yet are flexible. As it swayed in the stiff breeze, I headed back home to finish out the craziest year I can remember.
I grinned as I ran. Like the oak, I’m still here.