Learning to how to properly fail

I like to tell a few stories about my kids here. But my wife and I want them to grow up outside of the public eye — so I leave details kind of fuzzy. And we want them to stand on their own — and while they are proud of what we do, they are succeeding on their own.

That said, as a parent, the greatest challenge their mom and I face are teaching them how to fail. It’s hard because they don’t fail. They’re very talented kids — and yes, I am very proud of them for that. But at this stage of their life, they have to know how to recover when they fall down. I didn’t learn it until college and afterwards. (Life has been giving me lots of opportunities to hone that skill since then). I nearly failed Accounting II in college and would have until I got a 92 on the final. I cleaned toilets for a year when I thought I’d be a cartoonist. I had never “failed” until then. I quickly learned that whining about it didn’t solve jack squat.

I had to get busy.

My kids have to learn that, too. They have to make mistakes and learn from them. And sometimes, it might be someone else’s fault that you face difficulty. But your reaction is all on you. They also have to understand that a failure is only truly a failure if you don’t learn from it. If the rules are stacked against you, you have to be so damn good that you can overcome that.

Life isn’t fair. But it’s darn good teacher. I hope I’m one as well. It’s the one time I truly can’t afford to fail.

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

Think Pink

557613_10100488066243196_211770684_n

“Whatcha selling the raffle tickets for?” I asked one of the other soccer dads last night.

“A friend of mine has Stage IV breast cancer and we’re raising money to help pay for her care.”

I’m not sure I need the prize if I did win (and I probably won’t) but I pulled $20 out of my wallet before he could finish his sentence. She needs it more than I do.

This is Breast Cancer Awareness month. You’ll see lots of pink around — and that’s a good thing. Once upon a time, women suffered in silence. No one talked about breast cancer — it was a taboo topic. First Lady Betty Ford did so much for other cancer survivors by being open about her cancer.

Breast cancer has touched my family. I’ve also lost friends to the disease. As a melanoma survivor, I understand how hearing “you have cancer” can rock your universe. Fear. Pain. The feeling of being alone.

That’s why I cheer all the talk. If you know someone with the disease, love on them. Support them. Give them your prayers and your time. Doctors do a great job on the medical side. But it’s up to us to help heal the emotional one.

If you hear the three words, every day is cancer awareness day. But until there is a cure, our support can go a long way to lift up those who need it the most.

Posted in Blog, Cancer, HOPE, Writing | Leave a comment

Classnotes: October 1

Thanks to everyone who came to field trip. Hope you enjoyed the experience. Be ready to share any social media you created and other thoughts about what you learned. And Dustin Barnes has agreed to come out to our class soon. I’m also lining up a field trip to Mississippi Public Broadcasting. We’ll be able to visit their TV and radio studios. And we’ll meet Ashley Jefcoatsocial media guru at MPB.  You’ll like her. 

A few stories of interest: William Shatner picks a fight with Al.com 

Best times to use Facebook and Twitter.

More best times to post. 

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

City Hal

12049622_10156111389575721_2304435225482027363_nCall The Mystery Machine. Get Fred, Daphne, Velma, Shaggy and Scooby on the phone. We have a mystery to solve.

For several weeks now, the sign in front of the Jackson City Hall has read this:

“City Hal.”

Here are a few of my theories of what might have happened:

1. Copper thieves stole the missing L because they thought it was real gold.
2. The L got furloughed. (or worse)
3. It’s a tribute to Hal White.

One commenter on my Instagram said it is Country Hal’s sophisticated brother.

I don’t know. What I do know is that a new L probably wouldn’t cost much to buy. Heck, Therese Apel even suggested running over there with a Sharpie. And yes, I know the city has bigger problems. But little stuff like that makes you think that maybe things are worse than we feared. Sure, the streets and the budget are falling apart. But at least keep the grass cut and the letters on City Hall together.

It’s the same reason I get up and shave even when I don’t feel like it (unless it is beard season). It’s just the little things. Or should I say ” ittle things.”

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

What I love about Mississippi:

Yesterday I was able to interview a world-class pianist (Bruce Levingston) and one of America’s top entertainment moguls (Sam Haskell). I learned powerful lessons from both.

We’re very fortunate here in Mississippi to not only produce such world-class talent but to have access to them when they come back home. My JSU students got meet Bruce and watch our interview as it was being taped. I walked away a better person from the conversation. Bruce reminded me that one of the secrets to being successful is to take action and don’t take no for an answer. He has high standards and expects the world to live up to them. I teared up watching him play the piano. It was a truly a powerful moment.

Anyone who knows Sam Haskell knows he’s a force of nature. With Southern charm, a great attitude and energy to burn, he became a force in the television world before retiring from the William & Morris Agency. He has since gone on to save the Miss America pageant. He and his uber-talented wife Mary have two great kids and now grandkids. The thing I noticed about Sam is that he showed up exactly on time for the interview, was flawless in his delivery, went out of his way to make it an easy experience for the crew. He was kind, funny and a damn good interview. He’s pro. Like Bruce, you can tell he has been at the top. And both believe in giving back. They pay their blessings forward.

When I finally got to bed, my head spun as it hit the pillow. The last thought I had as I thought about my day was simply this: Thank God I live in Mississippi and can meet such interesting and fascinating people nearly every single day.

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

The Mastery of Marie Hull

2-An-American-Citizen

American Citizen.

Marie Hull started life taking piano lessons. By age 20, she was making art with a paint brush instead. For the next 70 years, she used her talent in a most proficient way. The Mississippi Museum of Art currently is exhibiting a brilliant collection of her work. Bright Fields: The Mastery of Marie Hull is more than a bunch of pretty paintings. It’s a showcase on how we all should live our lives.

Curator and world-class pianist Bruce Levingston guided me through the exhibit yesterday. (Mississippi Public Broadcasting taped it — when it is online, I will post a link). Like a master teacher, he used Hull’s work to hammer home the lesson. First he pointed out her signature. It evolved as she grew more confident in her talent and place in the world. Then he showed me something even more powerful.

She never settled with one style. She always kept changing.

That’s so important for an artist to learn. It’s so easy to get into a rut and tempting to hang onto something that’s commercially successful. But that can come with a cost — both mentally and physically.

Hull’s career can defined in three parts: Traditional, transitional and impressionist. Early in her career, she did haunting portraits of Depression-era Mississippians. Her floral paintings from the 1950’s are stunning. She traveled widely and captured landscapes in Europe and the Middle East that will take your breath away. And as she entered the twilight of her career, she painted impressionistic paintings that just explode with colors. Bruce said Marie Hull “saw color like he heard music.” I can believe it.

Marie Hull was a storyteller. But she didn’t settle for one single way to tell her story. She experimented and changed. In her mind, experiments never failed. They just led her on a new and more exciting journeys. Journeys that took her around the world.

That’s a lesson artists — and all of us — need to remember.

Thanks to Bruce Levingston and the Mississippi Museum of Art​ of art for allowing Marie Hull to teach me with a such beautiful exhibit.

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

Putting out Sprinklers

I tend to complain about things I have no control over. I’m not naturally positive — I have to work at it. And some days I don’t work hard enough.

The current drought is pissing me off. I refuse to water because, well, I hate dumping money on my lawn. But this drought has gotten severe — to the point even trees are dying. The Reservoir is down and if anyone who is reading this knows what Yazoo Clay is, you know your house is probably doing a dance right now, too. I’m mad as hell and can’t do a thing about it. Last time I checked, I’m not in charge of making it rain.

I was fussing about it the other day and my wife, a woman who I respect, looks at me and says, “Quit complaining. You can’t make it rain but you can put out the sprinklers.”

She’s right. Yeah, I’m going to have to spend some money. But I can control the things I can control.

Boy it sure is easy to get overwhelmed these days. Watch the news and you’ll see what I mean. You have so many things to worry about. I know. I’ve seen my job do somersaults. Add to it the challenge of raising upstanding kids and worrying about ill parents — well, you get it. Life’s not a cake walk. It’s not even a Little Debbie walk.

So, I look in the mirror and make the changes I can make. I put out the sprinklers instead of complaining about no rain.

And the world around me is greener for it.

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

The Adventures of an Awkward Athlete: Chapter 13 — Embracing the suck.

First of all, I am thankful I workout outside on a football field when it’s dark. Why? I know I look super stupid when I’m going through the drills.

It’s the awkward part of the title of this blog. It’s a proven fact that I am NOT graceful in anyway when I workout. Or pretty much the rest of my life.

OK, that’s out of the way.

We did a cool drill where we had to jump up five times and grab our knees. When done, we ran five yards and did a pushup. Then we ran another five yards and did five more jumps. Rinse and repeat all the way down the football field. Then we ran back.

If that sounds like it might slightly suck, well, you would be correct. It definitely winded me. But somewhere around midfield I had an epiphany. (I might have been a lack of oxygen). Each motion became more than just survival. It became about getting better. And stronger.

I leaned into the exercise instead of fighting it. I embraced the suck.

It was a change in mindset. I quit worrying about being tired and started being a warrior.

Now to carry that into the rest of my day.

Posted in Blog, Fat-Fit-Fat | Leave a comment

The World Needs You

Make a difference by being a bright light in a dark world.

Make a difference by being a bright light in a dark world.

Tough times require tough people.

You must be tough mentally, physically and emotionally. And you can’t allow others to manipulate your feelings and steal your joy. They have agendas and fears. Don’t play their game — you’ll lose every time.

Self-discipline, even when the world seems like it is falling down around you, is the boat that will carry you through the storm. Don’t depend on others to understand, care or support you. But do understand, care and support them. That’s what will give you strength. Pay your blessings forward. Because it’s not about what you receive –– it’s about what you give. The Universe will return the love back to you.

Train your brain, your lungs and your heart. You’ll need all three to be strong. Read good books. Learn to breath deeply and methodically. Stretch and exercise. Build a seawall to protect you from life’s storms.

It’s true the world doesn’t owe you a thing — but you can give so much back to it. Light your inner flame and be the bright spot in a dark time.

When you are strong, negative people shrivel like a salted slug.

Be strong. Be tough. The world needs you.

Posted in Blog, Writing | Leave a comment

Class Notes: September 24, 2015

We need to wrap up reading Michael Hyatt’s book Platform:

Read Chapters 8,9,10,11,12,13,14 and 15 before the next test. I will go through some of the high points today.  I am also bringing a copy of my Social Media/Marketing plan for my book for you to see. We’ll discuss it and why I am doing the things I’m doing. That will give you a better idea as you are setting yours up. I want you to write yours up like mine and bring it to me by next Thursday’s class.

Tuesday is field trip day.  We will start at the Clarion-Ledger. Being on time is imperative. YOU MUST BE THERE ON TIME.  Dustin Barnes, the online/Social Media expert at the paper, has agreed to take time out of his busy schedule to meet with you. If you show up late, that is disrespectful to him. We’ll also meet with several of the editors and writers at the paper. And I’ll introduce you to some of the advertising staff as well. When we are done, we will head across the street to the Mississippi Museum of Art for the taping. It is either at 9 a.m. or at 10. If at 10, I will introduce you to the staff and you can see how a shoot is set up. But you can leave at regular time.

There is free parking at The Clarion-Ledger. There is a lot across from the Police station on Pascagoula Street.  Head toward the Interstate from JSU and the lot is to the left next to the CL.

I REPEAT: YOU MUST BE ON TIME. 

Posted in Blog, Fat-Fit-Fat | Leave a comment