I have a confession. I’ve been having an affair.
Her name is Debbie and I’ve had a crush on her since childhood. But an innocent crush turned into something wrong — a torrid affair.
I’m a cheater and I’m ashamed.
I have no excuse other than the fact I was weak. I guess it was because I craved how she made me feel. Her sweetness made me feel warm. I can still taste her on on my lips. It was wrong. I know it.
I was weak. I lacked self control. I thought I could just see her occasionally. But no. I’d find myself sneaking around to be with her. I knew being with her was bad for my heart. But I couldn’t stop.
But it’s over now. I’m walking away. I will cheat no more.
Little Debbie, I loved you and your snack cakes. Star Crunches. Zebra Cakes. Swiss Rolls. Oatmeal Creme Pies. I loved them all. But I can’t cheat on my diet with you anymore.
Goodbye Debbie. I wish you well.
My dad used to hide Little Debbie cakes around the house so my mother would not find his entire stash at the same time. Not good for a diabetic.
My weakness is Nutty Buddies.