Forty minutes before my speech, I was standing on the patio enjoying the warm summer evening. Mobile Bay was to my back and several distinguished doctors from Louisiana and Mississippi were in front of me. A brilliant MD from New Orleans and I started talking about the importance of hope in medicine. He said, “In my career, I’ve come to the conclusion that you can’t complain about the cards you are dealt. You just have to play them the best you can.”
A warm breeze blew off the water, rustling the leaves of a nearby tree. While I had heard that basic saying before, something inside of my head clicked. It might have been the moment. It might have been the aura of wisdom given off by the doctor. Whatever it was, nothing had made more sense in a long while.
“In my career, I’ve come to the conclusion that you can’t complain about the cards you are dealt. You just have to play them the best you can.”
My brother-in-law Adam was dealt an incredibly crappy hand of cards. A couple of years ago, he was diagnosed with Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) — or more commonly referred to as Lou Gehrig’s Disease. He and my sister had every right to complain about the cards they had been given. But Adam played them well. The man lived the rest of his life with an upbeat attitude and dignity. Sure, he had moments of struggle. But he set an example for everyone who knew him to follow. He loved my sister. He lived his life to the fullest. He didn’t whine. He didn’t quit. When he died, ALS won the hand. But Adam won the game. He lived his life with complete passion. He played his cards the best that he possibly could.
Ryan Estep was driving his truck when it ran off the road. When the then-Florence High School student overcorrected, the wheel came off. The truck ended up in a ditch. Ryan ended up in a wheelchair for life. In a flash, life dealt Ryan some bad cards. But the 2012 Paralympian fencer, ranked as one of the top in the world, has played those cards very well. Sure, he could have complained about his situation. Who wouldn’t be tempted to throw the mother of all pity parties? But he has been skydiving, traveled around the world and won on the world’s stage. His can-do attitude inspires so many others. Like he told me, “When I was first paralyzed, I put all my energy into thinking things could go back to the way they were. But within a few days, I realized I was going to have to adapt to my new situation. And I did.”
Ryan could have complained about the cards he had been dealt. He chose to win instead. Adam could have whined that life wasn’t fair — the had every right to. But instead he showed strength that lifted and inspired everyone around him. Like Lou Gehrig himself, he made sure he let people know that he was the luckiest man alive.
We’ve all been dealt some bad cards lately. My wife and I were talking this morning about the state of the world and she said, “So many people I know are in pain right now.” I looked at her and just nodded my head. The Great Recession has been an nasty, uncompassionate dealer.
But as I think about all the strife in the world, I think back to what the wise doctor said: “I’ve come to the conclusion that you can’t complain about the cards you are dealt. You just have to play them the best you can.”
All I have to say about that is this: “Amen, doc. Amen.”
