Marshall Ramsey

NAMI MS was nice enough to give me an award last night. (NAMI is the National Alliance for Mental Illness.) for my advocacy. I was one of many wonderful people honored — although I’d be the first to admit the other recipients were much more deserving. But it got me thinking about mental illness, the ridiculous stigma attached to it and the challenges facing those who struggle with it. First of all, look around you. People to your right and left most likely are struggling with something. Mental health is brain health and encompasses a wide range of problems. There is nothing shameful, weak or horrible about it. That’d be like being ashamed because you have heart disease or cancer. Something in your body isn’t working well. You need to go see a doctor or therapist to figure out ways to fix it. And then you get treated.

Life isn’t a bucket of chuckles when your brain is lying to you.

So many roadblocks are there for people to get treatment. First of all, there’s the aforementioned stigma. People are afraid that getting treatment will be used against them. Will they lose their jobs? Will a spouse use it against them? Will people label them or think they are weak? Will people at church or work gossip about them? Then there is the cost, lack of insurance coverage or just lack of knowing who to go to when you are struggling through daily life. We all have bad days. But if those bad days are stringing together like a string of radioactive pearls, reach out to your doctor, pastor or even a friend.

I am not a mental health expert. I have, however experienced some anxiety (after my cancer and after being made part-time) and severe grief (probably light depression) from the exhaustion brought on by my parents’ illnesses, deaths and all the mud that was stirred up from it all. It, for a lack of better words, kicked my ass — or at least my brain. (and I got a concussion in the middle of it — that didn’t help either). I am fortunate I had great support from my family, friends and professionals. Being in the 4 a.m. wake-up club (Paul Lacoste’s Bootcamps and running) got me through the really tough stuff. When I get like that, I tend to turn inward and shy away from public interaction. I caught myself yelling for no reason and allowing things to fall through the cracks. I was a pain in the butt to be around at times. I was sad. It was tempting to self-medicate to make that pain stop — but I chose healthy habits to get me through it instead. I plowed forward.

I never missed work. I did a good job at my job. My feet hit the ground running every morning. I smiled and gritted my teeth. It was exhausting. But I knew I was not alone. My only regret is that I wasn’t the father, husband, employee and friend I could have been. It felt like running through molasses or running with your parking brake on. But I came out of it understanding why I am like I am — and I feel like I own a bunch of people apologies!
I’m back to whatever normal was for me. And in some ways, I’m better. The dark, cold fog of grief is lifting more everyday.

There are people in your lives who are going though much worse than what I experienced. They are lonely and are in very real pain. They want to cry for help but for all the reasons I mentioned previously, feel like that can’t. They feel like they are alone. And they can’t get the pain to stop. Reach out to them and care. You don’t need to be a trained therapist to do that.

The number one lesson I’ve learned is this: Mental health is health. You take care of your whole body, brain included, though diet, exercise and other healthy habits. And you use that health to reach out to others to make their lives better.

Thanks NAMI MS for the award. I was tired last night when I got to the banquet. But I was energized by the time I left. And congratulations to the other winners and the huge difference you make everyday by helping others get the assistance they need.

It’s a beautiful day after a very soggy day around Mississippi. The Avengers: Endgame is the big thing this weekend. I will be (as mentioned in another post) working on a term paper most of the weekend — so the Avengers is a carrot for me to get my work done. On Sunday, I am the speaker at an Eagle Scout ceremony and on Saturday, I’m going to break away from the computer to see my son run in the North State track meet. 

Otherwise my butt will be in a seat and I will be typing. 

Right now, I’m still digging up research for my paper and am preparing notes for a board meeting I have in a week. I will probably do a cartoon later this afternoon, but today is more screen time than creative time. My paper is on the current state of the newspaper industry, some possible ways to help it survive and ways to monetize the content digitally. Obviously, that’s a big part of my new job but it is also something I need to think about on a personal level too. For many years, I sat with my nose pointed at a drawing board and the world changed around me. Add to that some personal stuff and I have lagged behind where I need to be as an artist and an entrepreneur. There also is a personal responsibility component to all of this, too. Back in the day, I just worried about a cartoon a day. Now I have several universes orbiting the center of my personal brand. Long story short, I need to be better organized. 

Oh yeah, and I need to be a decent father to three of the most amazing boys on the planet. 

It’s all about focus, though: Like weeding out parts of my life that don’t matter and people who don’t support my mission. I can’t go down rabbit holes, etc. because I just don’t have the time. I can’t have people in my inner circle who don’t believe. 

I vow to start each day with gratefulness for another opportunity, to use my talent in ways that bring joy and thought to the daily conversation and to love others as I would myself (unless you’re in a political cartoon and then I will turn on the snark). My platforms? Radio, TV, cartoons, children’ books, social media and speaking.

That’s where I’m headed. 

A term paper is a pretty big undertaking but has been a great activity for me. I am completely stressed out by it but am doing this as I would if I had to eat an elephant — one bite at a time. But the beauty of it is that it has forced me to think about some things I haven’t.

To quote Shakespeare, “I have to get my sh*t together.” 

The bard was good with words like that.

About this time last year I ran a marathon with some friends. We had a blast and finished it in 4:45 — which is not a bad time. This morning, I ran (waddled) 30 minutes and cussed every freaking step of the way. A bad knee, a busy new job with travel and lots of Little Debbies (Big Deborah as I call them) packed 25 lbs. on my frame — I got up to 223 lbs. I swore I’d never do that again.

Yet I did.

The last time my scale shot up like this, I got up to 250 lbs. and it was also a year after a marathon. It was 2011, I had been made part-time, had to take a second job at a radio station and was propping myself up with sugary sodas to survive my 14-hour days. I joined Paul Lacoste’s bootcamp in January 2012 and lost 50 lbs in 12 weeks — and have kept it off for nine years. But this time, I saw what was happening and REFUSED to go back there. So I have modified my diet and cut back on carbs (Sorry Little Debbie, you are poison) and have started running again. My injured knee feels remarkably good. I know I need to stretch to keep from injuring it again. I’ll be back in the gym next week and plan on getting back out to Paul Lacoste’s bootcamp as early as this summer. My resting heart rate before the knee injury was 48 — which is amazing. It was 49 this morning. I have hope of getting back into the swing of things. But first, I need to drop 25 lbs. I’m already down five so I am on my way.

You really don’t realize how important exercise is to you until you can’t (and then won’t). Habits (good and bad) form quickly. I just chock this up to a life lesson and some needed rest. I’m a better person mentally and physically when I workout. It’s time to get back after it.

I promise Big Deborah won’t lure me to the dark side again.