Santa’s Miracle

It was Christmas Eve and Santa was hiding in plain sight. The big famous downtown department store had hired him as their St. Nick — and this was his final shift of the season.  He helped the last child off his lap and watched as she and her mother walked toward the door.  Ho ho ho. It was over.

Santa stood up, stretched and headed to the locker room to change. He removed his fake beard, put his red coat in his locker and grabbed his overcoat and brown felt hat.  The elves wished him a Merry Christmas and they all headed for the employee entrance. Santa walked out onto Broadway and turned north. Heavy sleet and overcast made a gray city that much grayer.

There were no reindeer. No elves. No magical sleigh. He did not deliver toys to kids around the world on Christmas Eve.  As much as he’d like to, it was just not physically possible.  But he did believe in Christmas miracles.  And his job allowed him to hear what thousands of kids wanted from Santa.  He did his best to let their parents know what they wanted under the tree.  The parents were his elves. And the parents did a fine job.  But occasionally there’d be a request that a parent couldn’t handle. That’s when he’d step in.

The cold sleet stung his face.  As he briskly walked, his breath hung in front of him like pipe smoke. He looked up at the red and green lights on the tall sky scraper. Low clouds tried to shroud it — but enough lights burned through to reveal the season. The sleet came down harder. Hurried shoppers rushed for the cover of home. People always wondered why people in the city moved so fast. Santa knew the reason: The city was cold and miserable.

He came to the slick stairs of the subway tunnel and walked gingerly down them.  The rail was icy, so he slowly made his way to his train. He had to get home because his cat was hungry. There was no Mrs. Claus — another myth created by the advertising agencies.  The turnstile beeped as he passed through and headed for the express train.  A TV on the wall had a earnest young reporter reporting the latest news from Wall Street.  Sleet fell on her, too, as she described the day’s terrible economic news.  The markets had crashed again.  Santa closed his eyes and remembered the dark days in the 1930’s.   He felt a gust of wind that announced the coming train.

Santa bullied his way onto the crowded train and found a place to stand.  Santa looked at the crowded car.  A short Indian man stared blankly out the window. An older lady fumbled with her packages.  An Irish man gripped his brief case like his life depended on it. An older black gentleman read the Wall Street Journal. And a man and four kids took up the seats on the right side of the train.

The man was probably 40.  He had dark circles under his eyes and it seemed that he had nothing behind them. It was like his soul had been sucked out and nothing but a void remained. The kids were running up and down the crowded car, bumping into the other passengers and generally annoying everyone.  The man just sat there, not uttering a sound to his own kids.  The other passengers glowered at him and the children.

Santa walked over and sat next to the man and put his arm around him.  The man turned his head slowly and looked at him.  “I’m sorry. My wife just died.  Some Christmas present, huh?”  Santa just nodded and pushed his upper lip into his mouth.

“My wife took care of Christmas every year.  I don’t know what I’m going to do.  I found her list in the room of what the kids wanted but honestly, I can’t afford anything. I owe the hospital $250,000. ”

Santa spoke, “May I see the list?”

The man handed over the list to the stranger — for some reason, it seemed like the right thing to do.  Santa studied the list and handed back to the man. “Have the kids been good?” The man nodded.

Santa herded the kids together and handed them some candy canes.  “You be good for your Daddy. It would be the best Christmas present you could give him this year.” The kids, sensing there was magic in the man on the Subway, went and sat quietly next to their dad. Santa smiled, looked up and said, “This is my stop.  Merry Christmas.” He got up, turned around and looked at the man and said, “As long as there is love in the world, you should never stop believing.”

Santa headed off to the train and on to his one-room apartment.  His cat Rudolph would be glad to see him.

Christmas morning had arrived. The sleet had moved east and revealed a cool, crisp day full of love and presents. In a small apartment uptown, a man and four small kids ran into their living room.  “I’m sorry kids, there’s not much under the tree this year.  Santa wanted to do more, but you know these are tough times.”  But as he finished talking, he noticed a pile of packages over to the right of the fake tree.

Each box had each one of the children’s names on it.  He handed the mysterious packages to each child and when they opened them, they found they contained the very things that were on the list their mom had made.  A doll.  A train. A video game.  A helicopter.  Each of the kids ran around the room, excited about his or her new toy.

The man then saw an envelope on the tree.  He picked it up, ripped it open and pulled two pieces of paper out of it.  One was a check.  The man looked at it and it was for $250,000 made out to the hospital.  The other was a note.  The man unfolded it and read it aloud, “As long as there is love in the world, you should never stop believing.  Merry Christmas, Santa.”

The man fell to his knees and sobbed.  And on that day, life returned to his eyes.  Santa was real. He was holding proof that Christmas miracles do indeed come true.

And in a single-room apartment, an old man enjoyed a fine breakfast with his cat Rudolph. Both watched the movie A Christmas Story and laughed with great joy.

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Sunday Free-For-All

Good afternoon! Sorry this is late!

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The Hunter & The Buck

A deer story for the opening day of gun season.

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Saturday Free-For-All

Good morning! Hope you have a great weekend.

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The day Santa took over Thanksgiving

On an empty stage in a big room, two podiums stood next to each other. Four rows of chairs were filled with print and TV reporters from around the world.  A man with a red suit and a turkey entered from the right and walked up to their respective podiums. The man in the red suit begins to talk:

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen. And members of the press. My name is Kris Kringle, CEO of Claus, Inc. and to my side is Tom Turkey, CEO of Thanksgiving Day, Inc. Thank you for coming out this evening.”

There was a slight gasp in the room. Believing was one thing. Seeing Santa for the first time was another.

“Today Claus, Inc. A division of Christmas Day has bought a controlling interest in and will immediately take over Thanksgiving.”

The room gasped.

Tom Turkey flapped his wings and rose up to the microphone,

“Gobble gobble gobble gobble.”

A translator, who appeared out of the darkness to the left of the stage, translated the turkey’s words, “With this economy, we could no longer afford to make huge profits and keep Thanksgiving as a separate holiday. We are sure the synergy between the two holidays will make for a better and more meaningful November and December.”

Reporters wrote madly.

Santa continued, “I had pretty much eclipsed Thanksgiving anyway. I mean stores are starting their Black Friday sales on Thursday.  Christmas decorations now appear in June. In fact, we are in negotiating taking over Halloween and the Fourth of July.”

Reporters scribbled wildly.  All three cable news networks broke into coverage.

“Gobble gobble gobble gobble.”

The translator looked at the turkey and said, “People around the world need to be thankful everyday, not just one Thursday a year. ”

A reporter asked, “So, Tom, what do you get out of the deal?”

“Gobble, gobble, gobble.”

The translator said, “Santa will have ham for Thanksgiving.”

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Friday Free-For-All

Good morning! We made it. Just 12 more hours of work to go.

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The Guardian

Thunder woke Betty McFane’s dog first. He stood on the end of her bed shivering and whining trying to alert her that something was seriously wrong.  She opened one eye and gazed at her alarm clock; it was 5:15 a.m.  Hail hitting the roof rattled her other eye open. The constant lightning made it look like it was noon.  Her heart began to race.  The power suddenly went out and a loud roar deafened her screams.  It was 45 seconds of Hell.

The next thing she remembered was the world going black.

She opened one eye again.  It was still black — except for one sliver of daylight.  She did a quick personal inventory and discovered she could not move her legs.  She also tasted the iron-like taste of blood trickling into her mouth.  She stilled her mind for a moment and listened.  Silence. Eerie silence.  She screamed for help.  Silence screamed back at her.

Then she heard a whimpering sound. At least her dog was still alive.  But she didn’t know if he was hurt — or even how bad she was hurt. Or if she’d even survive this.

She began to pray.

“I’ll take care of you.”

She could not see where the voice was coming from. Or tell whose voice it was.  But it was comforting.

“You’ll be OK.  And don’t worry about your dog.  He’s stunned but fine. He was thrown a few yards, but landed safely.  I’ll stay here with you until you are rescued.”

She felt calm as she reached out to the stranger’s voice.

“Who are you?” she said.

“A Good Samaritan. I love that story, by the way. One of my favorites in the Good Book.”

From the crack in the debris, she could tell that the sky had turned blue. She had no idea what time it was.

“What time is it?”

“About time for you to be rescued. Stay calm.  Help is on the way.”

She had no reason to believe him, but she did. It was a strange kind of faith — a faith born from the fact that she had no other options. Her back wasn’t against the wall; the wall was against her back.

She closed her eyes and said a Hail Mary.

“She heard you,” the stranger warmly said.

The woman, with her whole world piled on top of her, felt peace like she hadn’t before in her life.

“The cavalry is here,” the stranger happily announced.

The sound of a truck on her gravel drive broke her trance. Then the sound of another one. And another. Muffled voices grew louder and then the sound of shifting debris lifted her hopes.

Suddenly the daylight flooded in, created a square of light framing a beaming face, “I found her!”

It was her son.

An army of volunteers swarmed and quickly she was freed from the wreckage of her home. Her dog, cut but not seriously injured, sat glued to her as the paramedics treated her head wound.

Relieved that she was free, she looked at her son and said, “Did you see the stranger who was watching over me?”

“What stranger? Mom, I didn’t see anyone when we pulled up,” her son said. “Honest. The only stranger I know of is the person who called me to tell me your house had been hit and that we needed to get over here right away. He never would give me his name.”

She looked out at the wreckage of her home. Her dog licked her hand and she responded by carefully scratching behind his ears.  “I know, boy, I can’t believe it either.”  There were a lot of things that were hard to believe.

But the one thing she knew for sure was that she’d never forget the stormy morning her guardian came to watch over her. She said a prayer of thanks and started to rebuild her life.

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Thursday Free-For-All

Good morning! It’s 4:30 a.m. and start of an awesome day!

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Mathlete

An illustration I did for my oldest son.

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The Best Thanksgiving Ever

The parking lot of the Quickie Gas & Groceries was empty that Thursday afternoon. The whole world was gathered around the table, saying thanks and enjoying the company of loved ones and friends. All except Elizabeth J. Clarke. She was working the midday shift on Thanksgiving at this rural convenience store to make a little extra cash for college.

It was the worst Thanksgiving ever.

She stood behind the counter, behind the Five-hour Energy and the Beef Jerky, reading her law book.  If there was a silver lining, it was that she was getting paid to study.  Time and a half never looked quite so good.

Her boredom was interrupted by a beat-up older green Chevrolet Malibu that pulled into the parking lot.  It pulled up to the store and parked.  “OK,” she thought, “They aren’t getting gas. So I’ll be having company.”

Two young men in hooded sweat jackets threw open the doors of their car and got out. One had his hands in his pocket.  She hated to profile, but her heart started racing. Who knows? Maybe they just needed some gum to get rid of their turkey breath. She almost laughed but her heart was racing too fast to let that happen.

The bell on the door rang and she noted their height against the doorframe measurement.  “STOP IT!” she shouted at herself. “QUIT THINKING NEGATIVE.”  One of the men went back toward the drinks and got a six-pack of beer. The other circled around and disappeared from her line of sight. He was the one with his hands in his pockets — she desperately checked the video monitors.  Panic set in.

Suddenly he appeared holding a gun!  Her law book hit the ground as he started screaming a string of obscenities that would make a sailor blush.

“GIVE ME THE @#$@# CASH IN YOUR #$%#$ DRAWER YOU #$%#$ING #$%$#!!!!!’

His eyes were red and his hand holding the gun was shaking almost as violently as she was.  Whatever he was on was making him even meaner than he probably was when he was sober.

She hesitated and that cost her.

“NOW! YOU #$%#$%!!!! I SAID @#$%#$ NOW!!!!!”

She was openly sobbing, pleading for her life. “DON’T KILL ME!”

That made the man holding the gun even angrier.  He thrust the gun against her forehead and screamed, “NOW!!! ”

She felt the cold metal of the gun barrel against her forehead.  When it touched her skin, time slowed down to a crawl. The screaming man’s voice slowed and suddenly she had her life flash before her eyes: Playing with her dad on the floor of the living room. Winning 1st place in her science fair.  Her first kiss. Graduating with honors. So many Thanksgiving dinners with her family…

She saw his bloodshot eyes blink and then his finger slowly squeeze the trigger. So this is how it would end. Right here at the Quickie Gas & Groceries on Thanksgiving Day.

It was the worst Thanksgiving Day ever.

She closed her eyes and prepared to meet God.

click.

The gun jammed.

The angry man holding it became even angrier and screamed even louder as he ran out the door to the waiting car.  The two would-be robbers and murders scratched out of the parking lot and onto the rural Mississippi highway with only a six-pack of beer.

What had seemed like hours had only lasted a minute.  She fell to her knees sobbing, appreciative of the life that she still had. Of the experiences she would still get to experience. Of the family she would get to go home and love tonight.

Lying on the floor of the Quickie Gas & Groceries,  Elizabeth J. Clarke cherished the second chance at life she had been given by the jammed gun and thought the only thought she could:

It was the best Thanksgiving ever.

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